Finding your focus can sometimes be difficult and may even feel impossible at times. Mine was knocked off this year, not so much by covid, but by trying to find my way as a mom. It’s a little harder when you go from zero to three. Zero to two was mostly ok, but that was a practice round of five days, and they were older. But this round is a long term commitment and figuring out where I fit within the needs of three kids and a husband has been harder for me to figure out at other times of my life.
Part of my problem is I want to do all the things. And not that I can’t, but I can’t do all the things right now. I have to find focus and priorities till all the things get done. And even some of the things that I don’t want to do, like cleaning the shower.
It doesn’t matter what the reason is for feeling hazy, but here are some tips for finding focus that seem to help me.
- Make a list: When I feel out of control and don’t know what to do next, I make a list. For as much of a free spirit as I am, I love a good list. My problem is always following the list, but it’s a starting point.
- Plan ahead: Don’t wait until the moment to decide what you’re going to do in it. Plan ahead. The experts say plan at the beginning of your week. Sometimes I’m successful in that. Sometimes I plan the night before. On bad days I’m planing the morning of, but I try to plan ahead.
- Block out your calendar: Once you know what you want (or need to do) you need to make room for it. For work and personal life, I block out my calendar and I put as many details of what I’m doing during that time in the block. I’ll write more in another post about this, but it helps me know what I need to be doing, what dinner I’m making, and a slew of other details that help me focus on my moment.
- Figure out a system: Finding your method of keeping all your things organized it important for focus. Things have changed a lot which means systems and habits need to change. Make your systems so you have to think less about where something goes or what to do next.
These are the practical task type things I do to help me gain some focus, but sometimes there’s an emotional side to things too. Here’s are the centering or Mindfullness things I’ve been trying to do in order to focus myself again.
- Do less: I have a tendency to start a lot of projects that never get finished. So I have a pile of unfinished things over my head that add pressure and make me feel like a failure. Doing less helps. I honed in on this a couple of years ago, and it was time to do it again. Focus on the things that you really love, not the things you like.
- Write or doodle: not everyone likes to write all their thoughts and feelings down, so if that’s not you, then doodle, or make a list. Whatever helps you get what on the inside out so you can get perspective.
- Set expectations in reality: We all play mind games with ourselves and have the set of expectations that we think we need, usually based on what others think. Then there’s reality, which is rarely the same list. Make sure the expectations you have are set in reality.
So these are the ways I start bringing focus and clarity back into my life. There are probably more, but this is usually where I start when life feels a little fuzzy and out of control.
My recommendation for you, if you want to find your focus again, is pick one of these things to start doing in your life, get it under your belt, then pick the next thing. Trying to do all of these at once is only going to cause you to be fuzzy and frustrated, and then quit.
To help you out, I made a workbook to help you find a little focus in your life and see what is really important. It’s in my freebie library, just sign-up for the newsletter for access.
Ready to get a little more focused? Check out my printable planner inserts here.
